Sometimes the best thing that can happen in life is realizing Sai alone stays with you forever. Every time i believe someone will be with me all my life, they suddenly disappear and am used to such situation for years together. I didn’t imagine that it will repeat again in my life at this age after years of sai seva. Probably, my bad karmic deeds is yet to be washed away and am supposed to suffer.
I am going through a painful situation where the girl i truly loved is not with me any more as her parents and she decided not to talk to me anymore. All i could do is keep chanting.
Saint Ramakrishna’s devotion on Dakshineswar Kali – A dream that inspired me:
Couple of weeks back, i was blessed with a dream in which i heared Ramakrishna. I started searching for books on Saint Ramakrishna but din’t thought deeply about his life. Only today, i realize Sai wants me to learn how Saint Ramakrishna being a priest of Dakshineswar Kali temple was hooked to her devotion. There are stories where Ramakrishna behaved strangely that everyone called him Mad. I have been a devotee of Goddess Durga for many years as my Amma used to ask me to light lemon lamps to Goddess Durga.
Only the past few month, i started regularly visiting the Bhadrakali Amman temple 2 kms from my house. Somehow, there are few Goddess temple which sends me a divine blissful feeling in my chest as soon as i see the goddess or apply Kumkum. I love Goddess Annapurani, Thandu Maari Amman, Durga and Bhadrakali.
Learning to see women as Goddess:
One thing i wish to express from my experience is that it’s not enough to worship Goddess. We must learn to visualize the women in our life like our Mother, Sister, friends, wife and daughter in the form of Goddess. When i was really pained and in anger that my girl din’t spoke to me, its Bhadrakali who inspired me to perceive her as Goddess and once i started doing it, all i had is divinity – I had tears in my eyes.
Read below link which i wrote on the day i met my girl blessed by sai dream
“Sai Bhadrakali” – Naam smaran is my breath and soul.
Sai is my Sweet heart, My friend, My Guru and my breath and soul. I have tears in eyes when i write this friends.
Bhadrakaali – Is my sweet Goddess. There’s a Bhadra Kaali Amman temple 2 kms from my home and i love her dearly. In September 2012, when i completed Durga Saptashati parayan, she appeared in my dream.
Naam Smaran – Chanting with Divine Visualization:
Many devotees speak about meditation etc. To me, doing meditation in a busy day is heart. I am able to do Naam smaran – Chanting of Gods/Saints name no matter what i do and where i go. So i started doing chanting doing the below imagination.
How to build a Temple in your heart?
I imagined as if building a small Garbagriha for Goddess Bhadra Kali inside Dwarakamai of Saibaba. This way i can feel that Shirdi Sai Baba is also living in the temple of my heart along with Goddess Bhadra kali. Garbagriha is the innermost sanctum of a Hindu temple where resides the idol of the primary deity of the temple. I decorated my beautiful Bhadrakaali with Jewels like Nose ring, bangals in her hand, a beautiful necklace with green stones in the shape of lotus leaf and red stones in the form of Lotus. Then i offer a Greedam – Crown made of diamonds on her head.
I decorate my Goddess with beautiful Yellow saree. The shade of yellow that’s known to me and the Goddess alone. I myself tie garland of 108 white lotus and offer it to her.
Where is my sweet Sai baba all the while? Sai is sitting near Dhuni – Sacred fire in Dwarakamai. I offer coconut and beetle leaves along with One Rupee coin as Dakshina. Yes i am Kanju – a miser. I only offer one rupee coin for my Baba.He he…and Baba is supposed to bless me with lots more.
I press Saibaba’s legs as a small seva and could see Baba’s Sparkling eyes full of love oozing out on me. Baba, how many births have we been together? Why do you care so much for me Sai? Will you not leave me alone for a minute and if you do will i be able to breath. Sai, the moment you leave me, my breath will stop because you are my heart and you are my soul.
I make a special gift for Sai as it’s Valentines day – In my imagination, i see that it’s still early 19th century. Let’s say 1905. I am taking a tonga – Horse cart to Godawari river to have darshan of Lord Dattatreya in Datta Par Temple in Kopergaon from Shirdi.
Garland of White and Red Roses for Lord Dattatreya:
On my way back i see a old lady selling lots of White and Red roses. I take these basket full of roses, sit near the Datta Par mandir near the banks of Godawari in Kopergoan and start to make a garland chanting ” Sai Mahalakshmi, Sai Mahalakshmi, Sai Mahalakshmi”.
I make two garlands combining both the Red and White Roses. Lord Dattatreya in Datta Par mandir is very auspicious. I go near him, Light Agarbathi and 2 lamps. I bow down to him and offer a Garland of Roses to Datta. Then i come around the Sacred Adumbara tree chanting ” Dhigambara, Dhigambara, Shree Paadha Vallabha Dhigambara”.
I love the breeze of this sacred Datta par mandir in the bank of Godawari and surrounded by many trees. I also see few sadhus laying on the tree shade.
All this is happening in my heart, In my imagination friends..
Offering Garland of White and Red Roses for Shirdi Sai Baba:
As i am satisfied with darshan of Lord Dattatreya, i now take a horse ride back to Shirdi. Oh, how beautiful is shirdi full of greenary. There are only few huts and i see Saibaba in Dwarakamai from distance. I am fortunate as Sai is in good mood today and smiling at me as i climb the steps of Dwarakamai. I offer the garland of White and Red Roses to Sai and tell him
“Sai, I love you. I love you from the bottom of my heart”
Sai keeps his divine palm over my head and blesses me. I don’t hear any words from Sai. Even when Sai lived it’s not necessary that Saibaba has to always speak out his assurance. Mere Darshan itself is enough. The way Sai looks at us itself can change our life for good.
Lighting 27 lamps and building Temple for Mahalakshmi in heart:
Then i light 27 lamps infront of Saibaba and look at his glorious face. How beautiful and divine are you Sai. I feel he is none other than Mahalakshmi.As soon as this though comes in my mind, i have darshan on Mahalakshmi in the place of Sai.
Now i build a Garbagriha for Goddess Mahalakshmi in Dwarakamai and decorate her with beautiful Red Saree with white silver dots on it. I mix sandal paste and Kumkum in a little plate and apply on Mahalakshmi’s forehead. How divine is my Goddess. How sweet are you my Mahalakshmi. The 27 lamps which glows infront of Mahalakshmi literally shines all over her. Mahalakshmi’s Nose ring twinkles reflecting the fire of sacred Dhuni in Dwarakamai.
I continue to chant
“Sai Bhadrakali … Sai Saraswathi …Sai Mahalakshmi”.
That was my imagination friends…
The entire day, i was able to visualize in my heart the divine Goddess and also Shirdi Sai Baba in my heart. I was doing my work, travelling in bus , going to Saibaba temple in my home town, climbed up the terrace and offered garland to all the big Sai baba statues. I went to the top of Dwarakamai and cried to Saibaba to bless me with the girl i love. I kissed the mud in the terrace, came down and reached home.
While walking home also i was chanting “Sai Bhadrakali”.
I always used to chant – Sairam sairam sairam but sometimes , i love chanting Sai along with the Gods or Goddess i love. Today when i write this article in the late night, i feel blissful friends. I feel both Sai and Bhadrakaali are happy that i tried to do Naam Smaran all day. I wish to continue this chanting forever friends.
You can also build a Temple in your heart:
Many Sai devotees believe, going to Shirdi and taking darshan of Samadhi mandhir or going on any pilgrimage alone will change their life. The truth is that Sai lives in ourself as Antaryami. You can go to Shirdi when you get opportunity but be very clear that the real Dwarakamai is your mind. Your heart.
When i say that i build a Garbagriha for Bhadrakaali and Mahalakshmi in Dwarakamai, i mean my heart itself is like Dwarakamai where Sai lives and when ever i worship any Goddess , they come into me to reside in the dwarakamai of my heart.
It’s not necessary that you follow similar chanting. Some devotees only love Saibaba, Some love Lord Shiva and Some Rama. So you can chant as you wish
Simply – Sai..Sai..Sai
Sai Ram Sairam Sai Ram
or Aum Sai Ram, Aum Sai ram, Aum Sai Ram..
Tomorrow is Valentines day. I don’t have the girl i love with me. So all i can do is remember Sai as my Love and i believe Sai will take my love to my girl and bless her with peace and happiness. It’s also my Sister Indra’s birthday. So it’s good for everyone that am chanting these days and constructing a sweet small temple in my heart for Shirdi Sai Baba and Goddess i love.
Many devotees who have problems in life life, relationships, married life write to me. I honestly think there’s no easy solution for such issues. It’s all based on ones own karma. I am also a ordinary devotee. So i humbly request devotees to keep doing naam smaran and visualize Sai and any Gods/Goddess they love in their heart.
1. Always think and do good
2. Never hate anyone. You can show your anger but calm down. Sai wants you to love everyone
3. Try your best to do Naam smaran, read Sai Satcharitra and be positive that Sai will show you a way.
When i wrote this article, my focus was more on writing than chanting. Similarly, sometimes you may not be able to do naam smaran when you are busy with your day to day work. Make sure when ever you are free, you are able to feel the temple in your heart and start constructing it again.
Sometimes, i imagine as if i bring huge granite stones and use a chisel to make it as temple. I lift these huge stones to make temple as i wish. I also imagine as if sculpturing a Sai statue myself.
Sai, no matter what i do, i am still sad and worry about my old parents who are in pain. Please bless us. Let the girls parents be convinces and speak to my parents. Baba please do leela. I can only pray and shed tears with devotion and faith. Sai, you alone can show me a way.
Aum sri sainathaya namaha
Little Servant of Shirdi Sai Baba