Memories of Meera

Sairam friends,

I have understood something about life. If we behave in a certain way to a group of people, they expect us to remain in the same way forever. For example – Couple of month back when I had some issues at work, I tried to remain calm at least for a week without making fun of others and just minding my work. I just said that I am trying to shut my mouth and keep quiet for a week but my friends argued with me and said am over reacting for little things. So I again started speaking and making fun of everyone.

Today, I took photo of the Golu *( Gods and Goddess Statues kept for worship during Navratri days) and found the statue of Meera truly beautiful. I took many photos and actually wanted to take it better by keeping some Red and White Roses around her but I can only take what’s kept over there. It made me remember one of the oldest photography I did before several years.

Anyway, By evening , I was really upset a lot. The problem is, sometimes, we hurt others when we casually speak. Probably this is what Sai calls as “The sins of speech”. Today, I realized that I hurt someone and it really bothered me a lot. I told Baba to forgive me.

I came home. I hurt my Mom and Dad so much while arguing with them. I want to get rid of this life at times and go some where. I hate myself arguing with my old parents. My Ma is so weak but I keep hurting her and her feelings. Sai please bless me with good buddhi that I make my parents happy.

Its 12.45 at night. I really feel pained when I think of my life and all that happened. I am a total failure. I wanted to work on something that will make my life meaningful but its not happening. It seems I will do nothing worthy in this life. Adding to this, I have this pain once in a while which I cannot bear.

My eyes are closing now Saibaba. Please show me a way.

I wish to post the photo of the Meera Photography I did in 2005  and the so called poem I wrote..he he…

Those days, I used to spend several hours to take a single photo. I bought these candles from Saibaba temple, came home, lit them behind in a plate. Then I closed all windows to create darkness accept a small opening. The light softly falls on Meera’s face expressing her divinity. The candles portray how Meera’s heart melts for her beloved Krishna.

meera navratri
I love Meera

Simple words of expression from me to spread the message of lighting lamps !

Little Light

Twilight bounds the birds flying towards the east
Her mom parts the curtains breaking the day in
This is Meera from the small galaxy
A blossom of morning dream can be washed by time

Shes out of her nest…
Shes out of her nest….
Flies to the river and brings home flower

one after another flowers for the idol
Like a falling star in distant sky
As she lits a light illuminating her dark pathway
A little light to guide in her journey

To the palace miles beyond the seventh world
There lives someone who fills her life .
Her heart is a Light
Her tears are the prism

As heart penetrates tears
she feels a rainbow of her life.
A eternal rainbow as the light enters her tears
she saw someone for whom she lived her life
she continues to cry but her lips could smile.

Her dream came true…
Her morning dream came true…
This is Meera from the small galaxy
Lingering with the music of flames
for rest of her life…….

A new dream every twilight
comes true with a little light

Hmm…

So what’s life?

I feel that Sai, all Gods and Goddess are angry with me as I hurt my Ma and Pa. I am too self centered and never did any good to them all my life.

I want to create something useful and have a vision but things are not happening.

Yesterday, I was searching to buy a new Dslr camera. I don’t know if really necessary for me now. So left it.

I did nothing useful that changes others life for good. I must find some way to work on it.

Really a depressing day. I feel so dejected Saibaba.

Venkat

4 thoughts on “Memories of Meera”

  1. Sairam,

    Why would you bother saying that you didn’t do good to anybody? Writing these beautiful articles of life truths, words of goodness, Sai leelas will bring a small smile or a small comfort for those who read and those in pain. That itself is an achievement as not many can do that or even not many will do that. So be happy at what you are. There are many more in this wide world without the least basic things or with some unsolvable problems and living life (or writing like me :-)) From what I lightly learn you have solvable problems so try to be happy with the state you are . Let Sai be with you and guide you.

    Thanks

    Edit:
    Thanks for your kind words. When it comes to Sai Seva, Yes. I have done something of worth but this isn’t enough. I have been working on a project which I believe will add value to many people around the globe but I am not able to work on it properly. Further, My problems aren’t much. Just that my parents are not happy with me and Sai only has to show me a way. I am totally depressed. I wasted several years in my life and now feel as if I am running out of time. I must do something good.- Venkat

  2. sairam

    Don’t worry so much., when baba is there with u. Have faith in him and do ur work. And don’t get depressed so much.
    Everyone has one or other problems in this globe, that u know very well and nobody is in wine, everyone are created by god. And don’t allow any negative thought to entry, when baba is along with u. Even i have so much even i feel waste of living but still see…., he made me writ for u., that how its work. Always have positive thought so that our universe also fell easy to help us. Because i believe what we think, our though form, it happens the same way. Try our best in everything,do good, rest leave to our universe they will take care of us, obviously again we are back to saibaba…………….. our universe., OUR MOTHER. NO NEED TO SAY MORE, THE MOTHER WORD WILL EXPLAIN U EVERY. If u had felt so bab regarding ur Parents, pls go and ask them sorry., no issue in that and explain them, why your behavior got changed in that moment. sure they will understand u, they are ur parents. Express ur love and affection this is the time for it.

    Take care, u will do ur PROJECT WELL…, U WILL DO IT. C , if u want i will get mail from u, saying that it is going on well everything………………………………..

    bye venkatji
    Take care of u and ur parents

  3. sairam

    A person can do something good through

    1.physical efforts (like blood donation or bodily help)
    2. cash donations using his wealth or
    3. simply good and kind words (if he is poor and bodily not of good sound health).

    you have done and still doing good through all 3 means even though u are not rich.

    This itself is SAI BLESSINGS. PLEASE CONTINUE UR EFFORTS FOR THE SAKE OF OTHERS. MAY SAI BLESS U.

    Rajkumar

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