Steps to take for Better Communication – Good listening, speaking and writing skills

Sairam friends,

I really regret for not being able to write good in English and I also have fear of Speaking to crowd.  Further, when someone speaks to me, after few minutes, I go into my own thoughts and think something else. On the whole, I regret for not being able to write better. My Communication to Sai devotees may have helped thousands of Sai children but I know they are only tolerating my writings due to silly grammatical mistakes I do.

Since I write in hurry before going to office or during late night, I don’t correct my mistakes even if I find them when I read later. I get bored of corrections as I know my writing style itself is not professional.  I let go of it as no one is there to question me. Very rarely I do get mails from few readers in U.S that there are mistakes and I must improve.

I noticed that this problem exists not only in me but many youngsters across India. I am not speaking about the bright students who have reading habit from beginning and who are studying well. My concern is about students and professionals who grow up without learning to communicate better at all be it speaking or writing.

1. Cultivate Reading Habit

Why don’t we read books other than the books we are asked to read in schools and college? Do we at least read Magazines in the subject of our interest? No. Very rarely we are taking interest in reading. I humbly request each and every one reading this article is to buy at least one good book in any useful topic that interests you every month and read them.

Some people are only addicted to reading books but they either don’t read or they don’t apply what they read. So what’s the next step?

2. Apply what you read – Enhance your language on a day to day basis

Its not enough if you read books. You can’t keep consuming. You have to  be creative and make use of what you consumed.

Try to use the words you found in the books in day to day life. Try to learn meanings of words. People like me have very low memory. So its hard to remember even if we learn a new word a day. So try to put it in writings. Keep the habit of writing about your goals, your work and your life.

You can also write about any of your good experiences or of course write about your love for Shirdi Saibaba or any Gods and send me. If I have time, I shall post them in StarSai. You have to create an assignment for yourself to enhance your writing skills.

3. Think in the language you want to speak

This is the most important aspect of good communication. Our mind naturally thinks in the language we are comfortable with. For most of us its mother tongue and for few its a language they like. When you want to speak in English, think in that language.   When you want to speak in your mother tongue, think in that language so the right words are expressed on time.

4. Keep your mind at peace when you speak

I have this problem of getting nervous when I speak. I don’t like speaking to unknown people. Especially if I am asked to speak in front of many people, I get a bit nervous. Earlier, I don’t have this anxiety but now a days, Its really problematic and I try to avoid such events very often. I believe its good if you can keep your mind at peace when you speak

5. Watch how other speakers form a structure when they talk

Most people don’t show anger when they are angry. Good speaks don’t reveal their emotions even when they are. They talk very casually and that’s why they are able to impress thousands of people by conveying what they want to say. Structure of your speech is very important. Make sure you don’t touch unwanted topics and even if you have to, be clear and firm about the point you make.Make sure you don’t argue. If someone says you are wrong. Be calm.
Don’t feel ashamed if people find your faults or any negative qualities. Being calm helps at times.

6. Listen clearly – Allow others to complete

One of the mistake I do myself is interfering when others speak. Listen and keep listening. Until you realize the other person has finished or exhausted, never interfere in their communication. Try to collect the right points to speak based on what you listen. Your goal is to convey your message right and not to convince just one person or group.

7. Learn New Language

Its always good to learn a New language. I believe it helps you understand life better. So if you have time during week ends of evenings, make use of it to learn a new language. When I was into film making, I used to go to German Cultural center to watch film festivals and some events there. I simply drank tea and ate biscuit looking at other students who came there to learn German. My sister once told me that I even wasted that time doing nothing.

Why this article?

India has various educational institutes and every middle class family spends most of their earnings for their children’s education. The problem is we don’t really help our children communicate what they have in mind. We don’t encourage them with the habit of reading books.

Recently, when I help my friend in HR to keep communication test to freshers, I realized one of the reason for our poor communication is the way we use technology.

“Texting” is ruining our language skills

I text a lot and realized its drawbacks. Most of us has adopted to the culture of “Texting”. It started with SMS, online chat and now Mobile chat. What happens is that when we chat in hurry to friends our only intention is to communicate the message.

So we don’t mind if the sentence is complete. No one bothers about the grammatical mistakes. If this becomes our day to day communication, will it be easy for us to frame good sentences and speak with a flow when necessary?

There are many engineering and Management colleges across India which doesn’t give opportunity to students to enhance their communication skills.  Irrespective of the efforts these Educational institutes take, the students doesn’t show interest in improving themselves.

The very reason I wrote this article is because I have read some articles and books written by Indians before 50 years. Most of these books are wonderfully written and they are not professional authors. They had written just 2-3 books on the subject of their interest. Their language is really better than the writing skills of today’s students and professionals.

We have to take steps to enhance our Listening, Speaking and Writing skills.  The other day, i kept asking the trainees we have at work to have a look at how other companies are presenting and doing good writing work.

By researching and reading tips,they can learn to write better. My friends told me not to bore them but to me its something I want every Indian to practice.

You many possess lots of good skills but if you can’t express it clearly and precisely, your skills go unnoticed. Further, Speaking good and Writing well is an art by itself.

We naturally desire that others learn what we lack and struggle due to it all life. I feel happy when ever I help people to learn and grow.

I am going to repeat again in short….

Simple efforts to enhance your Speaking and Writing skills

1. Read at least one article everyday on anything that interests you and useful. Increase the number of articles you read when ever you find time.

2. Read at least one book a Month on the any topic you like.

3. Listen to worlds famous orators speech . Today I was listening to the famous “I have a dream” speech by Martin Luther King and also a Documentary film about life of Mahandas Gandhi

a. Martin Luther King – I Have A Dream Speech – August 28, 1963

b.  Documentary – MAHATMA – Life of Gandhi

( I was searching for Quit India Movement speech by Gandhi and found the above Documentary interesting)

4. Many people get inspired to speak better when they see others speech. So TED Talks can take few minutes of your day – everyday.

Listen to Richard St. John’s 8 secrets of success

or listen to the speech here

5. Take interest in doing something productive in your life.

All that I write matters only to people who desire to listen, speak and write better. So its all in you. You simply have to take little efforts and do it.

StarSai being spiritual Site, I also request you to worship Goddess Saraswathi and also Lakshmi Hayagriva to bless you.

Silence is precious

Yes. Silence is the best way to communicate at times. So maintain silence when ever you feel its better to be silent. Be Calm and communicate only when the need arises.

Kindly share your views on this and you can give your tips for Better Communication

Sai Saraswathi Blessings

Venkat