My Father is not well for the past 2-3 days. I will be taking him for checkup this evening.
I trust Saibaba will heal him. I can’t see him in pain.
I only hope its a small issue and it could be cured with few medicines. None of us are strong enough to accept any other complications.
Its very hard to make my Father go to Hospital but he has agreed now.
I don’t know what’s wrong with my life?
My pain after fever continues for over 2 month.
I lost my job
and now my Father isn’t well.
Last evening, I started analysing if I had done any sins to anyone in the past few years. May be or may be not. I am not sure what wrong I did to face all the pain simultaneously.
I ask myself if I had bothered any girl and couldn’t say I was so bad. In my past relationships, these girls family or themselves din’t liked me. So they quit. I was OK with that. I would have spoken to them harshly but I never disrespected them. I just felt they choose the life they want.
In the 8 years I had worked in a place, had I bothered anyone? Probably, the only mistake I did was writing to a girl saying Sai showed her in dream.While I asked Sai to clarify why he did this to me, for my part, I apologized to her several times. May be, this too is a sin for why should I bother a stranger unnecessarily?
Sai never proved his role in the whole issue. So I can only blame myself.
I had enough humiliation all through these 2 and half years because I lead life based on Sai dreams. Now, that I am out of the workplace, I only hope this girl doesn’t take whatever I did to her heart and forgives me.
I also can’t understand how we face difficulties in our life all at one period. May be, its the sins I did in my previous births? Can I say that I am not responsible for it now?
I can do little good deeds to wash away my sin but probably, the good deeds I do is not enough. Seems, Sai lets us undergo sufferings and that’s the only way our karma is washed away.
Whatever be the case, Its OK when I fail and suffer. I can take it but I want my Father to be healthy and happy.
I can be jobless for a while but can’t see my Father in pain. He has all reasons to lead a healthy, peaceful life Baba.
I pray Sai to heal my Father as soon as possible and restore good health to him.
I am getting scared.