Too lazy to be someone Sai wants me to be

Sairam friends,

I am not really working sincerely in the projects Sai asked me to do. I get too tired by the time I come home and simply don’t have mood to work further. My Mom too isn’t well which hinders my ability to focus on something creative. If I am lazy, how is Sai going to help me any way?

Yesterday, I had been to Saibaba temple in my hometown as it was Ram Navami. I never had any interest or intention to do photography of Saibaba with my DSLR Camera. They decorated Sai so beautifully and one of this guy in temple kept calling me and asked me to come soon to temple. I reached temple just before they started Shej Aarti. Some of these devotees asked me if i got my Camera and asked me to photography Sai. I immediately took the Camera and took some photos though the lit was too less for me to take good pictures.

I usually don’t do photography inside the mainhall without asking for permission and yesterday, I was too late for me to ask anyone.

There are devotees who write me saying, I was treated so and so in the Saibaba temple. It could be a temple in the U.S or Hyderabad or any where in the world. Learn to differentiate your relationship with Sai and the fact that the experience you get in temple is influenced by people who take care of the temple. So you must not go beyond the rules they have laid.

When you go to temple, just focus on Sai and do not always expect a pleasant experience.

Sai belongs to us and not the Saibaba statue in any temple for that matter.

So in any Saibaba temple you go, do not do anything that people may not be comfortable with. Further, I don’t understand why my friends who are Sai devotees expect me to photograph? Its a huge process of convincing people if I can do photography and then accepting what ever they say. Its better I remain as a devotee and experience Sai rather than doing something more.

I did photography of Sai but don’t feel like posting here because it was taken without permission. I have some policies in life which I stick to. If I don’t keep myself clear and clean about what ever I do, I will eventually face issues adding to ther other problems in my life.

I told my friend that there was a time when I was always in this temple and I don’t wanna spoil that relationship. So I just wanna come here regularly and peacefully go back home.

Coming back to my laziness, I believe its more about the willingness to work on something without desire for money. Most of the time, the work we do is directly co-related to “Profit”, “Money” etc. When I do a work through which I don’t have a revenue stream, I may not be tempted to work on it.