I went to Shirdi Saibaba temple last evening in my hometown and came home. Hundreds of Sai devotees used to tell me that I am blessed soul and that I am close to Saibaba. I wonder if its really the right way to perceive me. Yes. Sai has made me go through some experiences, hooked me to his feet and kept me with him forever and I wish to serve Baba for life time.
On the other hand, people who serve Sai in right terms has other issues to face.
1. Everyone wants me to be perfect. 100% Good in all aspects.
This never happens and sometimes, our decisions might show that we are self centered. If I or any one serves Saibaba, does that make them extremely broadminded? No. May be others are more broad minded than me. In every little thing I speak and act, people expect me to be perfect.
The truth is that, I am actually sacrificing my freedom to live self centered because I think Sai might not like this.
2. People think, I will be happy in life as Sai is with me. Yes. Saibaba is with me as much as he is with you but Sai himself punishes me and shows me that I am wrong even if I do a small mistake. If others do, Sai does not immediately react to it but since I am supposed to be good – all time,always, Sai reacts harsh to me.
So the truth is that am sacrificing my normal life because I don’t want Sai to get hurt by my behavior.
When ever I make fun of friends or speak ill of others, I tell myself “Am I doing what Sai don’t like”. Just that I make sure no one gets hurt.
When I am going through worst situation in life, all I have is my own way of accepting Sai for what he is. Most of StarSai until today are not miracles or the big things Sai can do to change our life.
Sai won’t do anything at times and we have to realize that we are supposed to go through a phase in life when even Sai won’t help. Its our karmic bond and Sai will be silently watching us.
We are just supposed to do good and be good even in such worst times.
This is how Sai works.
He want his true devotees to live their life on their own without depending on him. Just remember him but do not think “Sai will do this for me” because when Sai did not do it, you naturally show your frustration on Sai asking “Don’t you have responsibility to do good to me.”
Sai is in yourself.
We have to bear it all. All the difficulties in life.
Just love him and surrender to his holy feet but don’t expect anything in return.
Many people will not be comfortable with this article and advice me etc . I don’t write for devotees who are happy. I write for people who come here in worst pain of their life and seek Baba’s guidance. I have to tell them the truth because Saibaba is perceived as “Miracle Saint.”
Why is it so?
We want Saibaba to take all responsibility of our life and we live as we wish. Make use of every single day to remember Sai with love and do your work sincerely.
Sai will be happy about it.
Sai leela happens very rarely ..once in a while. For rest of the days, his invisible presence itself is leela.
I am going to chant “Sai..Sai.Sai” in mind without any expectation from today to 10 days. I will do other stuff too but in my heart, when ever I miss few minutes, I shall get back to it.
Try doing the same or any other way to remember Sai.
You can feel Sai as ordinary as he has to be experienced.
I like to experience Shirdi Saibaba as a ordinary, sweet fakir of mine. A Guru who just takes care of me without me actually knowing it.